Aug
30
Red face again …
My Strumpet Blog
12:59 am
… when I offered a half time snack of a bacon sandwich to my lovely gent. I had no idea he was a Jewish Vegetarian! 
Aug
25
Penis Van Lesbian
My Strumpet Blog
2:01 am
A strikingly handsome young man walked into the office of a Hollywood agent with his resume and portfolio in hand. The agent reviewed the young man’s slim resume and small portfolio with the care that was deserving of his fine young specimen.
“You have the very obvious good looks and excellent demeanor of an actor. Tell me, have you had any roles that I might be aware of.”
“Other than the requisite high school and college plays, no sir,” said the handsome young man.
“I dare say I know the reason why, with a name like yours,” said the agent.
“Sir?”
“Your name. Penis Van Lesbian. That’s not a name that will go far in Hollywood. I’d love to represent you, but you’ll have to change your name.”
“Sir,” the handsome young man protested. “The Van Lesbian name was my father’s, my grandfather’s and his father’s name. We have carried this name for generations and I will not change it for Hollywood or any other reason.”
“If you won’t change your name, I cannot represent you young man.”
“Then I bid you farewell — my name will not change.” With that, Penis Van Lesbian left the agents office never to return.
Five Years Later: The Hollywood agent returned to his office after lunch with some producers and shuffled through his mail. Mostly junk mail, trade journals and the like. There was one letter. He opened the envelope and removed the letter. As he unfolded the fine linen paper, a cheque dropped from the folds and onto his desk. He looked at the cheque. It was for 50,000 dollars! He read the letter:
Dear Sir: Several years ago, I entered your office determined to become an actor. You refused to represent me unless I changed my name. I objected, saying the Penis Van Lesbian name had been carried for generations and left your office. However, upon leaving, I chanced to reconsider my hastiness and after considerable reflection, I decided to heed your advice and endeavored to change my name. Now I am a famous actor with many roles and known to millions worldwide.
Having achieved this fame and fortune, it is often that I think back to my meeting with you and your insistence that I change my name. I owe you a debt of gratitude, so please accept this cheque with my humble thanks, for it was your idea which has brought me to such wealth and fame.
Very Sincerely Yours,
Dick Van Dyke
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Aug
14
Finding it hard …
My Strumpet Blog
2:43 am
… to get hold of me?
My apologies, I know I have been very hard to get hold of the last few weeks. I prefer to restrict the number of Gentlemen I entertain so I tend to take my appointments in advance therefore my diary is full fairly quickly. This combined with having a few days of non-strumpeteering activities has made me rather elusive and has been rather difficult to answer your calls and emails promptly.
Apologies to dear Gents who would like same day liaisons but I rarely entertain you at short notice, 24 hours is about the shortest notice I can manage or sometimes if you are wanting an evening rendezvous the very latest notice I would need would be in the morning of that day, although I can’t guarantee I would be free.
As much notice as possible is the best way to be able to come and have a few Bible lessons with this buxom wench!
Back to normal now though so will be more prompt in email replies and answering the phone, for a couple of weeks at least!
P.S The photograph is of one of the cobble stones in Pompeii, pointing the direction of the Ladies of pleasure!
(They don’t have them in Sevenoaks. 
)
x
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Aug
12
Kinky boots
Shameless soliciting
12:44 am
I don’t think you have seen a pic of me in my boots so thought I would post one.
Do excuse the whip, that was the photographers idea not mine!
No I’m not a Dominatrix/Mistress but I do know a few Gents enjoy the sight of thigh high boots and PVC, maybe I should get a photograph taken in my PVC dress and thigh highs?
I’m not into uniforms of any sort and don’t possess any, a lot are trashy and so utterly unauthentic that they look like something out of a “Carry on” film. Now I wouldn’t mind wearing a real uniform if someone really did want it but I would need to search for the real thing.  I do like certain looks depending on my mood and a Gents requirements. I enjoy mild roleplay, one of the most popular requested scenarios is to play the Secretary, yes you Gents seem to like that one. Squeezed into a tight crisp white blouse, a short skirt with stockings and suspenders and impossibly high heels my glasses strategically placed on the end of my nose, yes I have become quite adept at taking dicktation!
Back to the thigh highs, I wonder what it is that some Gents like about them, is it the height of them (I’m over 6ft in mine!) or is it a similar thing to liking stockings knowing that there is bare flesh at the top of the thigh?
Whatever it is it puts me in mind of Honor Blackman and Patrick Macnee …
x
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Aug
03
I’ve just realised I’ve missed my Escorting Birthday, it was August 1st, yes I have been a Strumpet, Escort, Courtesan or whatever you would like to call me for three whole years now and like the title of Ediths song says, I regret nothing. (Plus it gives me an excuse to post one of my fave songs on here!)
I have learnt a lot and met some wonderful Gentlemen and ladies too.
Thanks for making my time in this most honourable of professions a good and happy one and look forward to many more happy times.
(Eat your heart out Harriet Harman, do try and realise there are many, many educated ladies who actually choose this lifestyle and thoroughly enjoy it too, doubt you will ever read this though!)
xx